Regrets, I had a few!..

Life is so much complicated sometimes. The how, what if and why question is always in our life. There is some situations that knocks us down. Since, I came to know what the real world I live in, I had a lot of question always. What if I just follow what I want when I was 17. What if I just ignore and don't follow what is going on that time. I wonder how where I ended up. In my minor age and grow up mostly without my parents around, I used to decide what I want. And then suddenly, in a blink of an eye it was change. The dream of a young person shattered when one of the most fearsome nightmare came to reality. Reality that I cannot ignore, because every time I wake up in the morning, I am in the same situation over and over again. I tried to change my lifestyle and tried my best to make it more meaningful. Its too difficult to pretend that you are happy while you are not. One thing that makes me happy is my two little angels. They are the most beautiful moments in my entire life. Even though I am down, I always have a reason to smile. I promised to myself to gave them a life that opposite of what I had. Those promises that I am not sure if I achieved it. If I really accomplished it. To raised a children alone as well as miles away from them is very difficult. At times, I just want to go back and stay in their side no matter how hard it is. But, what if I don't leave them, what is my life now? I regret that I leave them at their young age. But I guess, this is the best thing that I ever done. If I don't fight my  freedom, I will be stuck on that situation forever. I believe that God have a plan why I am here and not there. I had few best moments so far but I guess there is more storms to come.  Because those storms that I overcome already made me strong and courageous. It makes me stand on my own ground and fight my battle everyday.  I cry a lot, but it doesn't stop me to dream more. The regrets that I had in the past made me to decide what I want in the future.  Because along in my journey, I met quiet few people who helps me to be who I am now. People whom I feel, I am safe and will never let me fall again. Yes, I had few regrets, and those regrets are the reasons why I am careful now. I am trying my best to avoid doing bad decisions. I can't undone everything what I had in the past, but I know my future will be more fruitful if I just move on and forgive all the people who cause my suffering. Life doesn't stop because of few bad decisions.
I just closed the chapter of my life where bad moments are stored. And then write a new chapter which includes everything what is best. Of course, I can't do it in my own. With the help of Almighty God, I know I can do all things, I can achieve what my heart desires.